I just learned that my world is going to be rocked in 4 months.
No, I am not 5 months pregnant, and just didn't notice. That is a physical impossibility with me, since I gain something in the range of 15 pounds just by thinking I'm pregnant.
Let me preface by saying that none of these changes are necessarily bad. Just different. Very different. Very different from my expectations, and as we've learned, expectations are a KILLER for me.
Let's back up just a tad bit.
Today we had a meeting scheduled with Big J & L's preschool teacher and their team of therapists. We convened to discuss what's coming up. Next year. As in, the year when all four of my children are going to be in school for all or part of the week. I am sure you can't hear the excitement in my typing. Because, I love my children and hoard every second I have with them. But let's be honest here. Sometimes mommy needs a break.
It turns out that Big J & L are doing so well that they may not qualify for as many hours of therapy and services as they currently receive. By law, any child receiving services through the special school district is guaranteed a placement in a preschool classroom. We are currently receiving 5 days of school through the special school district--but their teachers are anticipating that they won't meet the criteria for this many days of school next fall when they re-evaluate a plan for the wondertwins.
Here's where the fun starts.
We mention that Little J will also be at preschool there, and suggest it's probably NOT a good idea to put all three of our kids in the same room. For various reasons, but the main one being the overall peace and well-being of the classroom as a whole.
"He's signed up for two day mornings? Well, then they'll be in different rooms for sure, since Big J and L will be here in the afternoons," says the special school district rep.
"Pre-K, right? Our Pre-K class, which is strictly for kids in their year before Kindergarten, meets in the afternoons."
At this point, I think I lost brain function.
"So, my three year old will be here on Tues/Thursday morning, I'll pick him up at 11:30 and then have to bring my twins back every afternoon from 12:15--3:15?"
"Yes. Except there are no 5 day classes next year. So you're aware that Big J & L will only be here Monday through Thursday?"
Kaboom. That is the sound of my head actually exploding. Which it did, in fact do--but I put on my big girl pants, cleaned my gray matter off the floor and tried to piece together an act that could pass as sanity.
"Let me see if there is a spot in the purple room for Little J in the afternoons, then he could be here with Big J & L. Would you consider that?"
Yes. No. I think so.
No naps. All three young children at home every morning. I currently have only 1 child at home all morning, five days a week--so you might see why this is a total change for me.
"If Little J comes in the afternoon, I think we can work it out so that he can ride the bus with Big J and L. Does that help?"
Slightly. Maybe. Yes. I don't know.
Once I gave it an iota of thought, I realized it's not so bad. Just really different. I'll still have my two free days...they'll just be in the afternoons, instead of the mornings. Which means that instead of running Forest Park two mornings a week, I'll be able to take a nap on two afternoons. Okay, that's logic I can handle.
It also means all three kids will get the benefit of attending my bible study next year, which has an AWESOME kids program. I think the blood is starting to return to my extremities.
Really, the hardest adjustment is going to be having all three home every morning of the week. Because I am spoiled, and I currently exist as if I have just one child every morning. Which, when I had just one child, taking a shower was a feat similar to landing a triple lutz on ice skates. These days, with just one in tow, I'm pretty sure I could manage to save a pack of kittens from a burning building and still have time for a run to Target. Perspective.
There will be no naps. And that's a tough pill for me to swallow, but it was bound to happen sooner or later. And I don't wish to be away from my kids. But I like being intentional with them and that becomes so much more difficult when all three are here, because we shift into crisis-control mode.
No doubt this is going to take a lot of work. And planning. And grace, gentleness and peace from the Holy Spirit himself.
Start praying for me.