Here's my attempt to dump my mental issues upon you, in an attempt to avoid impending disaster.

Everyday as I am leaving the house, my car makes a small bump noise/jiggle as it hits the uneven spot on our driveway. And EVERYDAY, I think I've just run over a child.

But my greatest fear in the world is public speaking, so this says to me, that vehicular manslaughter of a minor might be second on the list.

FYI. This neurosis presents itself in crowded parking lots all the time, where I then imagine that I have hit and rolled over a total stranger. And I think it all stems from the limited mobility in my neck, which means it's always *kind of* a gamble when I reverse.

Also, I do this thing, at least once a day, where I freak out that I have left one of my children somewhere. Usually, I imagine it to be the place I have just left. The rear-view mirror usually confirms that I am wrong...but when one of my children is out of my care (school, playdate, etc.), it throws my mental equilibrium so far out of whack that I imagine it effects the weather patterns on the moon in some sort of fashion similar to El Nino.

Just kidding. I don't know what El Nino means. But I'm going to guess that it is powerful and weather-changing.

I am in the process of preparing for a Valentines Day gathering. And at the moment, I am zen and everything is controlled and I am blogging! But this is just the calm before the storm, as I can already feel tension building between me and a particular drink tub that is, currently, inappropriately placed.

Resentment toward inanimate objects is a very strong indicator of deeper-rooted control issues. All signs indicate that my predictable, pre-party break down is set to happen in about 21 minutes.