We are the world.

I completely understand how dictatorships are formed, and why they become synonymous with the terms "bloody massacre" and "reign of terror".



Let me tell you. It began with an *innocent* bean spill, cup snatching and general whininess. Offenses that were punished with banishment from the bean bin and a small cleaning spree.



However. When an individual (who shall remain nameless), then decided to soak all of our outdoor toys in a gallon of bubble solution, it was interpreted as an act of rogue terrorism, and major sanctions were imposed.





It is true. Terrorists cannot operate without bubble solution, paint or permanent markers. Though, in rare instances, toilet water has produced isolated, yet successful attacks.


Thus, with the insurgency squashed and sentenced to the dining room corner, relative peace insued. Bribes of television were offered, which added to the atmosphere of positive relations.


Until.


Tribal boundaries were crossed, and territorial disputes exploded with the re-introduction of paint. In a reaction similar to events such as the A-bomb, the assassination of a world leader or the occupation of the promised land, armies were mobilized against the innocent force that smeared orange upon the landscape of a kitty painting. Parties involved DID NOT understand that the paper in question belonged to the nation and not the individual tribes and peace talks were NOT an option as one of the parties made it clear that she would kill her enemies with her teeth if given the opportunity.


No treaty was signed. Rioting insued.


To re-establish order, a national superpower seized control and governed the stubborn, native peoples. Attempts at democracy and compromise for the greater good were met with severe resistance, thereby leaving the superpower with no choice but to rule with an iron fist and a zero-tolerance policy. Because the natives were CRAZY.


The superpower really just needed some time to deal with it's own issues. Because it is overcommitted to every, single global issue. Because it does not know how to say no. The superpower really just wanted to ignore the outbreak of the civil war, but it had a vested interest in making sure no blood stained it's couches. And also, if a major death toll was recorded, somehow, blame would be placed upon superpower which was minding its own business in the first place.

On a side note, the superpower *almost* launched a defensive attack when an allied nation noted that a certain M&M jar was suspiciously low. Yes, the superpower is unable to manage it's own national health crisis' because the crazy tribal people cannot get their act together and be trusted to govern themselves without supervision for more than 5 frickin' minutes.


April 14th. The day my children barely escaped massacre by an over-caffeinated superpower.