The laundry is militarizing, and armed with ebola.

I've been a little distracted lately, and as a result it seems that I have ripped a hole in the laundry-time continuum.  In case you are curious, this happens when you wash  a load of clothes, and FAIL to remove them from the dryer, before the NEXT load is done in the washer.  It gets even worse when you take the first load, and immediately dump it on the floor directly in front of the dryer.  And repeat this cycle three times.  Ironically, this equation can also be applied to Duggar pro-creation.  


I don't know WHY I didn't carry the clothes downstairs and fold them.  That would be like explaining WHY the Kardashians are popular, or WHY Snuggie's exist, or WHY I can't find five minutes to shower everyday.  Add to this mystery the fact that we are finding ourselves smack in the middle of the season when I can NEVER FIND ANY SOCKS EVER, which honestly gives me hives on a daily basis.  I will likely live in this kind of despair until allergy season hits in a few weeks, at which time I will *actually* have hives.  On my eyeballs.  


But I will have hives on my eyeballs in a new house, and it will be GLORIOUS.  


At the moment, I am packing the basement--and you with be SO GLAD to know that my 2007 ponytail has been placed delicately in a box of office supplies.  Right next to my post-birthing pads, because I am nothing, if not disgustingly consistent.  I'm actually saving those for some kind of blog giveaway, or birthday present--because I know you guys are TWISTED like that.


And because it's been a while, and I am yet unprepared to share the ending to our housing story, I will expose my innermost demons, and tell you that my weight loss total is anywhere from 8-11 pounds at this point.  Mostly because bloating is an unpredictable BITCH.  I am now so in tune with my body that I can tell by the amount my waist overhangs my flannel pj bottoms, as to whether or not it's going to be an 8 or 12-pound day.  The moon and global warming still factor in heavily with my weight loss; but surprisingly, (mostly) giving up Diet Coke has done jack.  And I miss it, dearly.


But in a little bit, I will be missing it in my new house, and it will be glorious.